Try another way

When we set our sights on a goal and don’t succeed, it’s easy to tell ourselves a story that keeps us chained to this so-called failure. “I’m not [fill in the blanks with your own favorite insult here] enough to accomplish that,” we may tell ourselves, then beat ourselves up with that story over and over and over, ensuring that we’ll never try again. But it is just as easy to tell ourselves a different story when we didn’t get what we wanted. And that story goes like this: “Well, that way didn’t lead me to what I want. I will try another way.”

These two sentences can be repeated for the next two days or two decades, however long it takes to find your way, that is, the way that takes you where you want to go. With this approach, there is no end point where we know for sure we can’t and won’t succeed. Instead, there is a spirit of practice and lighthearted fun. We are practicing getting somewhere and being creative about the ways and means of doing so. We are committed to the journey, and we are willing to keep moving in the direction we’re headed, no matter what. With this kind of spirit and fortitude, eventually we get there—with a smile on our face and the humility to enjoy and appreciate our results.

Remember: Your job is not to be perfect. Your job is to find your way. Keep a log of what worked, what didn’t, and what you intend to try next, and you’ll always be moving toward where you want to go.

Transforming fear to courage: Tip #1
Transforming fear to courage: Tip #2
Transforming fear to courage: Tip #3